Everyday Talk

"Parents, when you give in to anger, resentment or self-pity at your children's bad behavior, you make yourself the center of the problem. You are loving yourself first and most. You must love your kids enough to show them the danger of their behavior. They need to see that their first problem is with God, and only secondarily with you. You must be more concerned for them than  for yourself, and you must be concerned most of all for God. By modeling patience, love, self-control—and all the fruit of the Spirit—you teach your children how extraordinary God is." 

- John A. Younts, Everyday Talk

I can still remember the first time I heard, "It's not all about you." It was January 1997, in Austin, TX at the first ever Passion Conference. Some guy I had never heard of at the time, Louie Giglio, was the main speaker and one of the guest speakers was John Piper. One night when Piper was preaching, I can remember hearing for the first time the truth of God's Word in a way that I never heard before - "God is most glorified in you, when you are most satisfied in Him." It was earth-shattering stuff. I also clearly remember realizing that I had been reading the Bible looking for myself in it the whole time. Reading it and thinking, what was it saying to me? Piper explained, we should be reading the Bible searching for Him — His character, His attributes. The realization that "it's not all about me" was life-changing.

That was. gasp. 14 years ago. After all this time, it amazes me how easily I still want it to be about me. I mentioned awhile back that I started reading Everyday Talk after my sister-in-law recommended it. Well, this past week I read Chapter 5, and oh.my.word. It was so challenging. Once again, it wasn't anything I hadn't heard before. But in the context of raising my children, the truth of Philippians 2 just jumped up at me and pierced my heart. 
Younts reminded me that I need to be prepared for my children to sin, to make mistakes. It's crazy to me that I somehow forget this. That I forget that they aren't going to obey perfectly anymore than I do. Their sinning is inevitable. He also said that when they sin, to not take it personally. That's a hard one sometimes. I find that I am indignant with my children when they don't do things I want them to do. I get a little bent out of shape and find that my attitude is pretty pathetic. Its because I am making it about myself. I am putting myself in the center and I am letting their behavior get me in a tizzy. 
But he challenges the reader and says, "You must respond to sin in a way that honors God first, even when all your emotional responses are telling you to lash out or to give up. Trusting God when you are sinned against is an act of holiness. In your everyday life there will come times when your children's sin takes you by surprise. Prepare for that day so that your talk will show your God to be a holy God. Make your everyday talk holy, no ordinary." It's pretty amazing when you take yourself out of the center, especially when it comes to parenting. It quickly reduces the tension in the room. It allows you to think clearly and focus on it being a teachable moment. Thank you, Lord for these words of wisdom and truth. Please, oh, please, help me to remember in those moments. Those difficult moments that catch me off guard. Be quick to call to mind—it's not about me. It's about You.






Linking up over at Good Morning Girls